Everyone is talking about Natalie Portman's (semi-)nude scenes in Mike Nichols' new film Closer. Let's face it. We're geeks and Natalie Portman is hot! What's not to talk about? Unfortunately, that bastard Nichols cut out her nude scenes. But he didn't cut everything! Check out these captures to see what you get in Closer.
Check out the practicaly nude Natalie Portman here.
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Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 8, 2004 7:56 AM
Man I'd like to place my hand upon her fuckin' sexy ass and squeeze. And squeeze!
Take off your blouse,
And your hunderpants,
Then take a look,
'Cause here me and KG come naked, out of the side-hatch, with the oils and perfume and incense. Now you're groovin', put on a cool '70s groove. A funky groove to fuck to. Me, me and KG, it's all about sex supreme, we likes to cream jeans. Have you ever been worked on
By two guys who are hot for your snatch? That's what I'm offerin' you.
You step into our room,
And then you smell the perfume, you lay upon our roundish bed, and then you feel a tickling on your head. It's KG with the feather and the French tickler, look out baby he got the tools. And then you feel sumpin' down by your feet. It's me, it's JB, I'm suckin' upon your toes.
We don't mind sucking on toes! Good luck finding a boyfriend who sucks toe, ow! Havin' sex with me and KG, now you're talkin' double team supreme.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 9, 2004 11:32 AM
if you do a girl w/ another guy...youre a fag!!! why not another girl(instead of a man),its not like you can bang her anyway.just think,when this comes out...you and KG can give each other hand jobs in the theater. how sexy.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 14, 2004 5:56 AM
I am a representative for Ms. Portman
Please remove this news story/images immediately or you will be receiving a cease and desist letter and if you don’t comply with that we will shut down your site.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 14, 2004 12:25 PM
What makes you think he is a troll? Even if he is not a rep for Ms Portman, he has a point. Sure the pics are out and on the net, but you might want to try being less explicit in your responses to them. Natalie is still worthy of our respect, and we should give it.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 15, 2004 11:46 AM
Nat and Mike know each other well and she trusted him when he said he wanted a nude scene. Since she has always been against such exposure, she trusted him and did the scene. However, when he showed her the scene, she didn't like it and found it "distracting" to the entire film. That is why the Mike took it out...at her request, you sickos.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 17, 2004 7:21 PM
That is correct, that is what happened. Still, it isn't like she won't still be showing some skin in what is making the cut into the film. Face it guys, this is a fanboy's dream come true.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 18, 2004 4:14 AM
I don't get what the whole thing with Natalie Portman is, I mean sure, she's a good looking chick but why the need to see her naked when there are countless other girls out there who are perfectly willing to get down and dirty for the camera. Is it some kind of Phedolphile thing you've all had ever since you watched The Professional?
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 18, 2004 12:46 PM
no,its wanting something thats harder to obtain.for example:if you get the local slut into bed,who cares? everyone else had her too.but,if you get the local virgin into bed,its a totally different story.its almost taboo.its not a big deal for jenna jameson to be nude in a magazine.but,it would be much bigger deal if avril lavigne posed naked.who would expect such a sweet little flower to go sleazy on us? ya dig?
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2004 9:01 AM
I just wanted to say that I recognised those lyrics from Tenacious D as soon as I started reading them, and all the other dumbasses that thought you wrote that in some maniacally horny state are, in fact, dumbasses.
all the other dumbasses that thought you wrote that in some maniacally horny state are, in fact, dumbasses.
Because as we all know, if you dont know Tencious D your not really human. I cant remember how to work the VCR, thus im getting the chair. What a world.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 23, 2004 6:40 AM
If the guy a few posts up was her representative, why would he refer to her as Ms. Portman and not Miss Portman? She's not a divorcee. It seems like he'd know at least some basic information about her if he was truly her representative.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 27, 2004 4:19 AM
I am a representative for the representative for Ms. Portman
Please remove this news story/images/inflamatory remarks about my client immediately or you will be receiving a cease and desist letter and if you don’t comply with that we will shut down your site.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 27, 2004 6:37 PM
Okay defintely someone trying to stir up something. Look, Natalie herself says she doesnt mind pics of her being on the internet, so why would this bloke here imply otherwise, hmmmm?
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 15, 2005 9:06 AM
Natalie rocks! She ist a pretty girl and looks like an angel.
I saw the movie two hours ago. I don't like the movie because the story was terrible.
the actors were cool! ;-)
But I don't understand the end of the film! Can someone declare the end? Please...
Have someone pics from the cut senzece?
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 15, 2005 1:03 PM
Jesus, if a representative of 'Ms Portman' wants the images taken down they would email the owner of the site via the 'contact us' button, and not post on here...
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 16, 2005 6:40 PM
u people suck - get a life - the Tenacious D lovers and haters... u are all fucking morons and so am I for reading and contributing to this line of bullshit. Everyone here needs to read a book oncein a while (some without boobs or laser beams). I can't wait to hear someone's ignorant opinion on these comments.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 23, 2005 7:40 PM
STOP READING, START WANKING YOU FUCKING GEEK! YOU SAD NON WANKING MOMMYS BOY GAY FUCKWITTED RETARD :) (DONT REPLY OR ILL FIND WHERE YOU LIVE AND DO YOU MOMMY IN DA ASS)
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 26, 2005 1:51 AM
Highly amusing, you have obvisouly no spent much tim in the ancient art of cussing mothers, I would jsut like to take this opportunity to suggest that your mothers each and everyone of them fucked so many pigs that there fanny's smelt of bacon
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 26, 2005 8:55 PM
whoever the uncreative jackasses that have been keeping this pathetic little pissing contest should go get eachother's phone numbers and stop wasting everyone's time. the whole point of these posts is to discuss just how incredibly goreous natalie portman looks, not (however you may want it to be) about sucking our grandmother's cocks.
so, i think natalie is quite a gorgeous girl and the two "screw you bitch" brothers should be thrown through several pains of glass or beaten without mercy with the hook end of a hammer.
thank you
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 27, 2005 12:17 AM
Yes i know shes very sexy and we should all stop this insane talk, but if i want to post some text about "FUCKING YOUR MOMMA IN DA ASS" I FUCKING WELL WILL! :) please go to the link below for my reply too all the following sad, whinnging,whinning little gay, bacon smelling, crack smoking sons of bitches, who sit and read all this shit all day whilst they get a microscope and some tweasers to jerk themselves off with.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 27, 2005 12:21 AM
Yes i know shes very sexy and we should all stop this insane talk, but if i want to post some text about "FUCKING YOUR MOMMA IN DA ASS" I FUCKING WELL WILL! :) please go to the link below for my reply too all the following sad, whinnging,whinning little gay, bacon smelling, crack smoking sons of bitches, who sit and read all this shit all day whilst they get a microscope and some tweasers to jerk themselves off with.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 27, 2005 12:21 AM
Yes i know shes very sexy and we should all stop this insane talk, but if i want to post some text about "FUCKING YOUR MOMMA IN DA ASS" I FUCKING WELL WILL! :) please go to the link below for my reply too all the following sad, whinnging,whinning little gay, bacon smelling, crack smoking sons of bitches, who sit and read all this shit all day whilst they get a microscope and some tweasers to jerk themselves off with.
Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on January 27, 2005 12:43 AM
NOT THAT ANY OF YOU SAD MUTHA FUCKERS DESERVE THE BELOW LINK, ITS JUST I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU, BUT IF YOU GO THERE, IN THE VIDEO SECTION SEARCH FOR NATALIE PORTMAN, AND ALL THE SCENES ARE THERE FREE TO DOWNLOAD, SMELL THE BACON NOW BITCHES!!! :) LMAO
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Everyone is talking about Natalie Portman's (semi-)nude scenes in Mike Nichols' new film Closer. Let's face it. We're geeks and Natalie Portman is hot! What's not to talk about? Unfortunately, that bastard Nichols cut out her nude scenes. But he didn't cut everything! Check out these captures to see what you get in Closer.
