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Quote of the day:

"The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names." -- Chinese proverb

Subject: Well welcome back mr fag balls!
From: (No Email available)
Date: 2004-03-15 16:40:28

ur calling me a retard when u know im a kid who can afford a phone, wats touch typing? some way t txt 4 poor people?
u dont relise how famous u r in my school do u? i have copy and pasted this whole post and sent it to all my friends,and to some people i dont know with a message saying, retard thinks 13 year old kid who can afford phone and who can actually rap is a retard,
if u dont believe me, u can se the message and talk to the 47 people i sent it to, liksoong@hotmail.com,
ur makin us laugh. hard.
i dont expect to see post saying i cant rap when none of u are any better, im best friends with a nz rapper whos famous, u can even type his name in on google and look at his lyrics and then see him at my house on a webcam, your only humiliating yourself, all were here for is a laugh every now and then and that doesnt mean weve got notin else better to do cuz it only takes 10 minutes to type a message,

these momma jokes are from the people who got the messages that u sent,

Your mum is so poor, when someone stepped on a cigarette in your house she said,"who
turned off the heating?".

* Your mother's so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
* Your mum's so stupid she can't pass a blood test.
* Your mother's so stupid that when she swam accross the East
River, she got tired half way and swam back!
* Your mother's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead, because
she wanted to make up her mind.
* Your mum's so dumb she stole free cheese.
* Your mother's so dumb she asked for a price check at the $2 shop.
* Your mother's so stupid that when I asked her to buy me a color TV
she asked "What color?"
* Your mum's so dumb, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
* Your mother's so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super-Bowl.
* Your mum's so dumb, she locked herself in a motorcycle.
* Your mum's so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see
what was on the other side.
* Your mother's so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone.
* Your mother's so dumb it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.
* Your mother's so dumb, she got locked in a supermarket overnight and
died of starvation.
* Your mother's so dumb, when the sign said "Don't Walk",
she froze and got hit by a bus.
* Your mother's so stupid, she ordered a cheeseburger without the cheese.
* Your mum's so dumb, on the job application where it said "sign
here,"she wrote quot;Aquarius."
* Your mother's so dumb she tried to drown a fish.
* Your mother's so stupid she bought a solar powered flashlight.
* Your mother's so dumb she put ice cubes in the freezer
to keep the refrigerator cold.
* Yo momma so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she
ran outside with a spoon
* Yo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just
to make-up her mind
* Yo momma so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
* Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
* Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
* Yo momma so stupid she stole free bread.
* Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
* Yo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
* Yo momma so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable
tv shows at home.
* Yo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus,
she took the 22 twice instead.
* Yo momma so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
* Yo momma so stupid she had surgery on her butt and the
doctor removed her brain.

[45-35]

* Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
* Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What
a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
* Yo momma so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
* Yo momma so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower
* Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out
for Star Wars.
* Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn
off the surveillence cameras
* Yo momma so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
* Yo momma so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
* Yo momma so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
* Yo momma so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.

[34--1]

* Yo momma so old I told her to act her own age, and the bitch died.
* Yo momma so old she has Jesus' beeper number!
* Yo momma so old her social security number is 1!
* Yo momma so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch'
* Yo momma so old that when she was in school there was no history class.
* Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it.
* Yo momma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
* Yo momma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.
* Yo momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked
her what she was doing, she said "Moving."
* Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention!
* Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to
lick other people's fingers!!!
* Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.
* Yo momma so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater.
* Yo momma so short she poses for trophies!
* Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!
* Yo momma so short she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime.
* Yo momma so short she can play handball on the curb.
* Yo momma so short she does backflips under the bed.
* Yo momma so hairy she's got afros on her nipples!
* Yo momma so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
* Yo momma so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now
everybody calls her Hair Jordan.
* Yo momma nose so big she makes Pinochio look like a cat!
* Yo momma so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!
* Yo momma so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her
* Yo momma so bald you can see whats on her mind
* Yo momma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.
* Yo momma so flat the walls are jealous
* Yo momma house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside.
* Yo momma feet are so big her shoes have to have license plates!
* Yo momma aint so bad...she would give you the hair off of her back!
* Yo momma twice the man you are.
* Yo momma is missing a finger and can't count past 9.
* Yo momma middle name is Rambo.

thats from a LOT of people, some of them are made up and some are copy and pasted, about 50/50 i reckon,

please post back! your our best source of entertainment

ps: we actually MEAN those jokes, ur mum is dumb cuz she gave birth to u

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