Andrew Morton Defends Tom Cruise

By Wescoat January 17, 2008 2:26 PM

Andrew Morton's TOM CRUISE: AN UNAUTHORIZED BIOGRAPHY

In today's "How Creepy is Tom Cruise REALLY?" newsflash, the AP released an interview with biographer Andrew Morton, whose newish book, Tom Cruise: An Unauthorized Biography claims the dude is second-in-command at Scientology Headquarters and used frozen sperm from L. Ron Hubbard to impregnate Katie?among other things.

Naturally, the Church of Scientology wasn't too into these claims and released a 15-page statement to the Today Show in defense of itself. The statement coincided with Morton's interview on the show . My favorite part of the document states, "The Church does not, and never has believed any newborn is the reincarnation or the offspring of its Founder, Mr. Hubbard?never, never, never."

But the most telling statement in the Church's manifesto is the claim that Morton never actually interviewed the church despite repeated offers from church representatives. If that's true (and we don't really have any reason to think it's false), Morton is even more of a mud-slinging, shit-digging douchebag than I first thought. This theory is substantiated by the aforementioned interview, in which Morton comes off as a surprisingly inarticulate dweeb shrouded in a cloud of bullshit. I'm no Cruise, Holmes or Scientology fan, but I gotta give it to Hubbard's minions on this one: Morton seems skeezy. Anyone want to chime in and prove me wrong?

Just for fun, here's a list of celebrities I was startled and a little chagrined to learn are Scientologists:

Beck
Jenna Elfman
Isaac Hayes
Jason Lee
Juliette Lewis
Giovanni Ribisi