DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down

By Jack December 18, 2000 7:03 PM

After several email complaints and very frightening comment reading experiences, I have decided that the time has come to censor peoples comments.

Don't get me wrong, I am all for freedom of speech. But if freedom of speech costs me my soul and a free ticket to hell, I'm afraid I'll have to decline.

Okay, so it's not quite that dramatic, but really, every time I read comments (which are supposed to be feedback from readers with good and interesting points) I learn more than I necessarily wanted to learn about Patrick Ewing and his sexual perversions. (we all know that the sexual perversions spoken of here are in no way related to Mr. Ewing and are strictly the imagination of one sick comment poster and his followings)

So with that I officially declare this as the last time that we will allow uncensored comments.. so have at it, it's your last chance.

| comments: 53

Reader Discussions:

Post YOUR opinion too!

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by nstraps (go@away.com) on December 18, 2000 9:32 PM

My ass is on fire.

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by Mellya (groovychic@biteme.net) on December 18, 2000 10:01 PM

Did I ever mention my dream about gettin it on with all the DTheatre men at the same time? *wink wink* My favorite would have to be the dark arab looking guy ;) *lol* you know who you are, but you don't know who I am ;) Mind fucking is fun, and yes, I am evil!

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 18, 2000 10:06 PM

motherfucking son of a fucking goddamn shit fucking cock sucking pussy ripping ass fucking shit eating cunt licking fucking piss drinking shit stained fucking fecalphiliac cum drinking sucking fucking shitting sisterfucking piece of homofuckingsexual gay ass fuckity fucking fuck fuck!

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 18, 2000 10:08 PM

let me hump that ass with my big throbbing cock and spray my cum all over those flames to douse it..

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 18, 2000 10:11 PM

I'm extremely offended by your anti-gay remarks towards the end. I hate you. Fucker.

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 18, 2000 10:42 PM

I KISS YOU!!!

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 12:22 AM

Kudos to you, motherfucker.

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by sKillBot (travis@pulley.org) on December 19, 2000 12:49 AM

I get her first! Or at least second.

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by Azad (eka@dtheatre.com) on December 19, 2000 1:00 AM

Uh, yeah.. I'm the arab looking guy.. if you know me, you know where to find me.. baby ;)

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 1:31 AM

I'm so embarassed... All this time, I thought that guy was talking about the actor from TV's "Dallas".

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 5:59 AM

Isn't it ironic that Ewing is wearing an AIDs ribbon in the picture above when it is his monkey people that brought the disease to North America in the first place?

Rhetorical.

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 7:50 AM

If Patrick Ewing fell in a Forest and no one was around to hear it, would you rim my ass?

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by Acheron (denny@dtheatre.com) on December 19, 2000 8:36 AM

No, i get her first. I don't do sloppy seconds. ;-)

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 8:46 AM

This is an inappropriate comment. 

But yes, I would rim you.

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 8:50 AM

And now time for, Patrick Ewing's greatest hits:

"This one time I was rimming the Grinch (as played by Patrick Ewing) and accidently sucked his colon down my throat.?It felt like a wet paper bag."

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 8:54 AM

FASCISTS!!!!!! BOYCOTT DTHEATRE NOW!!!!!!!!!SPREAD THE DOINGS OF THE OPRESSORS AND TAKE A STAND!!THE PEOPLE WILL NOT BE SILENCED!!! WE HAVE A RIGHT TO HEAR PATRICK EWINGS JUICY BUTT-QUEEFS, NAZIS.

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 8:55 AM

you are a bunch of wierd sick ass mothers.. 
to bad they are putting a stop to you.

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 9:22 AM

What kind of a world do we live in when a Patrick Ewing comment cannot be freely read and written. Be careful dtheatre. Remember how dead your site was before the arrival of Homo Erectus (Ewing) himself. Patrick is your saving grace. The wave of fans and sexual admirers is growing, growing at an insane rate. Ewingites are everywhere. You work with them, you go drinking with them, you might even be getting anally raped by one on a bi-nightly basis. I assure you that this decision to censor will result in your demise dtheathre. The monkeys will run wild, whether in your theatre or someone elses. Let Ewing live, or dtheatre wil die. 
Ewing 3:16

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 9:27 AM

You're an idiot. 

A moron of the highest order. You're so stupid it's a wonder you can
remember to breath. Intelligent ideas bounce off your head as if it were
coated with teflon. Creative thoughts take alternate transportation in
order to avoid even being in the same state as you. If you had an
original thought it would die of loneliness before the hour was out. 

On an intelligence scale of 1 to 10 (10 corresponding to the highest
attainable IQ) you're rating is so far into negative numbers that one
would need to travel into another quantum reality in order to even catch
a distant glimpse of it. Your personality is that of a rabid Chihuahua
intent on destroying its own tail. Your powers of observation are like
that of the bird who keeps slamming into the picture window trying to
get that other bird it keeps seeing. You are walking, talking proof that
you don't have to be sentient to survive, and that Barnum was thinking
of you when he uttered his immortal phrase regarding the birth of a
sucker. You are, at varying times, tedious, boring, earth shatteringly
hilarious in your idiocy, childish, moronic, pathetic, wretched,
disgusting and pitiful. 

You are wholly without any redeeming social grace or value. If God ever
decides to give the planet an enema you'd better run like the wind
because anywhere you stand is a suitable place for The Insertion. There
is no animal so disgusting, so vile that it deserves comparison to you,
for even the lowest, dirtiest, most parasitic member of the animal
kingdom fills an ecological niche. You fill no niche. To call you a
parasite would be injurious to the thousands of honest parasitic
species. 

You are worse than vermin, for vermin do not pretend to be what it is
not. You are truly human garbage. You are a fraudulent, lying, predatory
charlatan. You are of less worth than a burnt-out light bulb. You will
forever live in shame. You have nothing to say, and Godwin's Law does
not apply when writing about you. 

You are the anti-Midas, for all that you touch becomes valueless and
unusable. Mothers gather their children close when you appear. You are
an aberration, a corruption, a boil that needs to be lanced. You are a
poison in need of being vomited. You are a tooth so rotten it infects
the whole body. You are sperm that should have been captured in a condom
and flushed down a toilet. I don't like you. I don't like anybody who
has as little respect for others as you do. Go away, you swine. 

You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little
worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a
cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a
revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are a curdled staggering
mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying
your alleged birth into this world. Meaningful to no one, abandoned by
the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed
themselves in recognition of what they had done. 

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species
as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very
thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid
you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a
fungus, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell? Monkeys
look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. You are
unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that
reality forgot. You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are
ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You
are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You
are a disease. You puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meatslapper. 

On a good day you're a half-wit. You are deficient in all that lends
character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and
filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all
unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. 

You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are
degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you
exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. I
cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. 

The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. Maybe later in
life, after you have learned to read, write, study, spell, and count,
you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many
of us "normal" people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of
mastering. It just wouldn't have been "right". Sort of like parking in a
handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social
struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you. 

P.S.:
You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly,
deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent,
opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted,
racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged,
imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous,
byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious,
splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful,
destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist,
narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic,
idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling,
restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystopic,
stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting,
censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous,
flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, and socially-retarded. 

Have a nice day. 

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 9:40 AM

I agree oh great one. If they censor, lets jump ship. Retarded-like dtheater sites are a dime a dozen. 

Little Ewing

RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 9:43 AM

Where shall we meet to talk Ewing tomorrow? Anyone know of a good place to post messages?

Ewing-In-Training

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 9:46 AM

You speak with a lot of big words. You speak using a lot of words. But can you speak Ewing?

Member of the Ewing Legion

RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 10:31 AM

I must not fear. Fear is the Ewing-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner Ewing to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only Ewing will remain.

General Baron Patrick von Ewing

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 10:50 AM

The Freedom of Speech is the Freedom to speak, not to be heard. 

Haiku:   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 11:17 AM

In the winter,
Ewing frolicks like a ho. 
Many weeping butts.

RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 11:22 AM

Message to all:
On behalf of Patrick Ewing, I would like to personally thank you all for making Patrick such a prominent figure in your literature. 
Best of luck in your future Ewing web endeavours. 
John Fogelman (Agent)
William Morris Agency
151 El Camino Dr. 
Beverly Hills, Ca 90212

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 11:31 AM

I could be misunderstanding the situation, but is it not my right to call it as I see it? Call a spade a spade sort of say? If I feel that some people look more like monkey's or pigs than others, then brother.. your gonna know my feelings. But this web-site is not about personal attacks. It is about decent human beings communicating with each other about common points of interest. Hey, if P.E. does resemble a primate, I don't care because I know a whole lotta folks who look like that, and there all my friends. 

Good luck with the site and your "editing". 

Dredal

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 11:34 AM

Hey Dredal, excuse me for asking, but do you play in the NBA?

Sargeant - Patrick Ewing Legion

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 11:55 AM

My name is Dredal and I enjoy sucking cum out of Patrick Ewing's ass.

RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 12:00 PM

Can anyone suggest any links for the supporters of Ewing? Long live Ewing! Long live "The Planet of the Apes"!

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 12:18 PM

actually that's the free speech ribbon...

Yay for the P.E. Message Board.   reply

Posted by Jack (jack@dtheatre.com) on December 19, 2000 12:22 PM

Maybe I should make the Patrick Ewing Message Board? I'll let you all decide.

RE: Yay for the P.E.?Message Board.   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 12:23 PM

That is an EXCELLENT idea! Long live bi-partisanship!!!!

RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 12:25 PM

You guys are a bunch of drunk'n teenagers. Everyone knows that bashing a black man gets you 5 - 10 yrs. Just review the Rodney King case. I don't know what you guys have against Patrick, but I think he's one swell guy. Swelling in the right place while strumming my hair with his fingers. 

I think Patrick should be mayor of ThunderBay. There they'll work for Lysol. 

A drunk'n Ingian

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 12:45 PM

Hey Dredal, how would you like my warm batch in your ass?

RE: RE: Yay for the P.E.?Message Board.   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 2:19 PM

I'm sure Patrick would be proud!

RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 6:13 PM

I'm typing you friggin moron!

RE: Haiku:   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 19, 2000 6:48 PM

hehe that was creative. :)

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by virtualias (sansnet@hotmail.com) on December 19, 2000 9:56 PM

After reading the previous responses, it is my humble opinion that if you censor comments on dtheatre, then you pretty much won't have any comments left.

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 20, 2000 5:49 AM

Yes but if your ability to be heard is supressed, then it is not total freedom of speech. 

Why don't you think before you write. 

Ewing

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 20, 2000 7:07 AM

I think they should just rename dtheater.com to Etheater.com. (E for Ewing of course). All Ewing all the time.

RE: Haiku:   reply

Posted by Jack (jack@dtheatre.com) on December 20, 2000 11:23 AM

God that's straight up beautiful!

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by Jack (jack@dtheatre.com) on December 20, 2000 11:32 AM

keep in mind the poll.. 36.6% want it to stop. A mere 10% want it to stay.. 20% would prefer to move it.. so I think I will move it. I think that while we will loose comments I am reminded of a quote I once (read: many times) heard.. "Quality not Quantity"!

PE Posting Board...   reply

Posted by Jack (jack@dtheatre.com) on December 20, 2000 1:34 PM

It's official: If I can get 18% or more votes for the new Patrick Erwing Posting Board I will make one.. But as long as I have more then 20% under YES I will be turn on censoring of DT comments.. For now they are on though. 

So Patrick Erwing FANS Send all your friends over to VOTE!

RE: RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by Loath (loath@dtheatre.com) on December 20, 2000 1:55 PM

I'm afraid he's correct. You can talk all you want in a soundproof room and you have full freedom of speech. We just don't have to hear it. On the other hand, if we gag you and put you in a soundproof room, then we're restricting your freedom of speech. Freedom of speech doesn't mean freedom to force others to hear it.

RE: PE Posting Board...   reply

Posted by virtualias (sansnet@hotmail.com) on December 20, 2000 2:12 PM

If you create this P.E. board just to appease those few members who like to make jokes concerning him (not to mention mysogynistic and racist jokes concerning him), then I think you're going against the purpose of this site. It's not a matter of "oh let's talk about Patrick Ewing" it's just an ongoing joke that people make, more like "let's see how we can comment on this article using Patrick Ewing." What you actually need to do is make all members more responsible for what they post, so that people are not so prone to making irrelevant and offensive comments, whether they concern Patrick Ewing or not.

RE: RE: PE Posting Board...   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 20, 2000 4:08 PM

I farted. 

~Lance Corporal P. Ewing

RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 20, 2000 6:49 PM

Thank-you. Who cares what these morons want to do to P.E. I want movie news. I agree with those who say that freedom of speech is great, but not being able to hear it is better. No problem with censorship in this situation.

RE: The rant that took 10 minutes to read.   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 24, 2000 5:06 PM

Jesus Christ, I feel sorry for someone with nothing better to do than spend hours writing a mediocre rant like yours. What a dork you must be. 

Have a nice day.

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 24, 2000 8:16 PM

That was the most worthless dribble and waste of good webspace I have EVER seen. I'm not exactly certain, but I believe that the individuals who have made derogetory remarks and the website itself could be sued on several counts. In this instance, freedom of speech may not be the correct answer. Simple, common decency, and respect should be what we try to achieve. 

RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on December 27, 2000 6:56 AM

ha.ha.ha.SUCKERS!!!I just knew that DT would SEE and grow tired of your childish inane crap!!!!ha!ha!ha!thank god! that YOU guys finally decided to shut these guys down.thank you.It will be nice to get back to discussing the various topics IN hand.That's all I wanted since I got on this thing awhile back but these little weiner-boys,and ewingites just annoyed the HELL out me,and I confess to sending hate replys to these wankers but to no avail...that is until you made the wonderful choice to cut these guys off.You SEE boys,YOU can now slink away INto some other site and continue your chidish there....ahhhhh what the HELL!!Smell ya later!!
13

RE: RE: RE: DTheatre.com to Put the Smack Down   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on May 6, 2001 12:46 PM

What he say???

RE: Haiku:   reply

Posted by A random shemp (No Email) on May 15, 2003 12:35 PM

in the summer he sucks dangle berries and takes time out in the hot sun to worship his celebrated long-weekended's work of storing the largest remains of penile shedding... post load.